When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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