i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
