I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
the day after is always just damage control
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize