Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm really into asian looking animals
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Randomize
