Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.