I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.