Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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