It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize