Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
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