Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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