cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
