Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
my poor anus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize