I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
