i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
