Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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