im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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