Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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