I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize