Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
