dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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