I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
