put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
