my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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