Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
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i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
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I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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