I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Randomize
