I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
