she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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