I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize