What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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