Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.

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  (617): a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo. http://tfl.nu/rlno
  Replies (8) Good night (1007) Bad night (698)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello

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  (703): Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello http://tfl.nu/a1cc
  Replies (3) Good night (936) Bad night (478)
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  (212): View more from New York

  btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up

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  (212): btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up http://tfl.nu/jzw8
  Replies (30) Good night (1124) Bad night (4866)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.

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  (914): Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary. http://tfl.nu/8dm9
  Replies (44) Good night (5438) Bad night (857)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  soooo we both peed the bed last night...

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  (301): soooo we both peed the bed last night... http://tfl.nu/xqno
  Replies (30) Good night (1001) Bad night (7116)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.

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  (541): I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago. http://tfl.nu/gs96
  Replies (50) Good night (5484) Bad night (1347)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd

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  (905): I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd http://tfl.nu/je1e
  Replies (6) Good night (1001) Bad night (2074)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.

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  (785): She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed. http://tfl.nu/l8l2
  Replies (16) Good night (3758) Bad night (1059)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm wearing red that night.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Noted, what shade?

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Whore.

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  (202): I'm wearing red that night. (301): Noted, what shade? (202): Whore. http://tfl.nu/7182
  Replies (9) Good night (3809) Bad night (743)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.

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  (832): i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night. http://tfl.nu/81zt
  Replies (12) Good night (2143) Bad night (425)
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  (530): View more from California

  I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.

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  (530): I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone. http://tfl.nu/lhn9
  Replies (5) Good night (982) Bad night (519)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.

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  (936): Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life. http://tfl.nu/qbmn
  Replies (6) Good night (665) Bad night (547)
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  (518): View more from New York

  THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason

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  (518): THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason http://tfl.nu/3zx2
  Replies (4) Good night (323) Bad night (607)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.

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  (403): Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me. http://tfl.nu/p2to
  Replies (1) Good night (271) Bad night (422)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach

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  (717): Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach http://tfl.nu/vivy
  Replies (2) Good night (871) Bad night (176)

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