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• (510): View more from California

  You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven

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• (858): View more from California

  ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (819): View more from Quebec

  there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.

  (1-720): View more from Colorado

  You sound pretty unsure about all of this.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts

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• (561): View more from Florida

  Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles

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