As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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