If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize