I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
