i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
