So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize