She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
