Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
