You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
