She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
