apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.