Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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