There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
