lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
