forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
