once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
