i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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