If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
