I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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