Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
