would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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