Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
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