Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
