My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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